


P.S. I Love You

by doieagenda



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Jisung is doyoung's nephew, Letters, M/M, Strangers to Lovers, Taeyong is soft, dotae, doyoung just wants to meet taeyong, penpals, taeyong is a wholesome mess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:34:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25664461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doieagenda/pseuds/doieagenda
Summary: Finding love was never Taeyong’s objective in using the pen pal app. It was only supposed to be harmless and friendly fun, but love has ways of inching itself into each and every person’s lives.In his case, love came in the form of Kim Doyoung.orIn which Doyoung and Taeyong are pen pals on a phone app.
Relationships: Kim Dongyoung | Doyoung/Lee Taeyong
Comments: 6
Kudos: 140





	P.S. I Love You

**Author's Note:**

> henlo it's me again with a third nct fic. I'd like to explain that the slowly app is a real thing and if you want to try it out, you can! it's really fun there. I did not make the slowly app descriptions here as accurate as possible because it's been a while since i tried it myself but you'll understand it eventually along the story.
> 
> enjoy!!

Doyoung was not addicted to his phone. Well... his problem isn’t as big as the rest of his friends in their small group whose phones are already probably glued to their bodies forever. Mostly, the ‘issue’ stems from his old phone not allowing him the privilege of having a large storage space that’s why its only purpose is for updates on his socials. 

And of course, Kart Rider. 

It made him feel a little like an outsider, but it’s a thought that always lingered in the recesses of his mind. He doesn’t ponder on it for longer than he should. Fortunately, he already saved enough money and upgraded to a phone with storage space that amounts to four times the last one. It also seemed like his friends were more excited than him about his new phone. 

_‘It must be their technology obsession,’_ He mulls over. Yuta, Donghyuck, and Johnny send him applications that he can download. Some pointless, and some fun-looking ones. However, he promises himself that he’ll only download one from all their suggestions, so he can live his life with a healthy relationship with technology.

“Self-care, methinks.” 

“Hyung, don’t be such an old man, your phone can take as many apps as you want,” Donghyuck points out to him. Doyoung knows his phone can allow him applications that are too far out of his count, but he really thought it over and limits it to his socials, Kart Rider, and one from their suggestion. 

“You really don’t wanna download pubg? It’s not like it’s gonna eat your whole storage,” Johnny says to him, his finger busy tapping on his phone screen. He shakes his head decisively and grumbles. Doyoung looks over to his other friend who is just as enthusiastic as the other two in presenting him apps that ‘made their lives better.’ 

“How about this app, Doie?” Yuta’s bright screen greets him, almost to the point of blinding him. He wonders how the other’s eyes haven’t burned to the back of his skull yet with the brightness that high.

“Slowly? What is it?”

“Pen pal app.” Yuta utters, not any word came after. Doyoung eyes him, trying to telepathically prod him to say more.

“Try it so you won’t have to be curious,” is all that he said. Doyoung considers it for a second and then opens his phone to quickly install it. Yuta with a smug smirk on his face turns to the other two whose mouths were slightly ajar. 

“Pay up losers, he picked mine.” 

He can’t believe the audacity of his friends to bet over his healthy usage of technology, but he doesn’t stay on that because he’s already setting up his account for the pen pal app. 

It took Doyoung approximately two days to actually try out the app Yuta suggested. He was too occupied with finishing a story in Kart Rider to care about anything else. It just so happened he lost in a match that he finds his finger hovering over the white letter icon on his screen. 

Already having some background about how the app works, he scrolls through the endless list of users. Doyoung has never actually been a judgemental person, but some people here really missed a mark in choosing their usernames. 

He finds a person who has 90% the same interests as him and is a year older, however the username was kind of untasteful in his opinion that it triggered a snort out from Doyoung. 

**_Tyongkitty_psps_ **

He shakes his head, scolding himself for acting so mean but he lets out another snicker at the username. He contemplated using his first stamp for this person, but then he can’t let this opportunity pass so he just goes along with it and types out his first letter.

_Hi, I’m Kim Dongyoung, currently living in Seoul and most people just call me Doyoung. I am 24 years old, working in the film industry as a screenwriter. A friend suggested this app to me, and I think it’s pretty cool so far~ even if you’re the first person I am writing to. Pen pals are a relatively new thing to me, so please don’t be a creep when you reply I am a baby :( I am eager for your response!! And also I hope you have a good day!_

Doyoung rereads everything and almost sends it, but he really can’t help himself, so he adds

_PS: I don’t mean to be offensive or anything (unless you really are one) but are you a furry? because your username is so clapped, I had to snort. Anyway, I am still looking forward to your answer ^^_

Satisfied with his letter, he sends it and tries to write to a lot of other people (with less questionable usernames). Perhaps, this app is really fun. 

Doyoung wrote 3 more letters after _tyongkitty_psps_ though he was not as enthusiastic and anxious for the others as much as the furry username. He flinches at the vibration of his phone on his chest. Why his phone is on his chest is beyond him, but he checks the notification anyway expecting it to be a text from his demon boss. The slowly logo appears on his screen which makes him jolt out of his couch. 

This shouldn’t have been a surprise to him, since he can check the status of the mail on the app, but he ought to just not...check it like a normal person. With jittery fingers, he excitedly opens the app and reads the letter that just came from the person he was most anticipating a reply from.

_Hello! I am Lee Taeyong and I’m from Seoul too, so this might arrive sooner than you think!! I am 25 years old and I’m a pediatrician because I love children <3\. I’m glad you tried out this app, this is honestly such a stress reliever and It’s a way to travel the world without you know… spending a fortune haha! Also, don’t worry about me being a creep, I am also a baby too. Thank you for wishing me a good day, I hope you have a good one too! _

_Love always,_ _  
__TY_

_PS: I am not a furry nor do I have wild kinks like that!!! My nephew was the one who gave my username hng. Also, need I make my point that your username is clapped too, sir. It has no flavor. K1mdoyoung isn’t so fun to look at._

Doyoung shuts his phone off and closes his eyes at how weird the feeling of receiving his first reply is. The adrenaline that pumps through his veins right now is skyrocketing, and his heart is pounding like a drum against his chest cavity. 

Maybe, it’s because he’s kept to himself so much that interacting with other people online gives him the thrill he’s been missing in his own personal bubble. Having pen pals is exciting and thrilling.

Lee Taeyong is thrilling. 

After a weekend of _only_ Kart Rider and slowly, Doyoung was thrusted in his usual hectic work environment. A new script awaits him on his bedroom desk, waiting to be edited. Being a screenwriter did not really require him to be present in the office, and perhaps it might actually be the best thing about it but sometimes, circumstances like Gongmyung, together with his family, busting in Doyoung’s house happen. So perhaps, having a flexible schedule isn’t entirely a good thing. 

A small favor. 

That’s it. All his older brother is asking for a _small_ favor. Doyoung couldn’t see anything small about babysitting his 3-year old nephew for a week just because Gongmyung and his wife won a week-long cruise exclusive for two people. 

Don’t get him wrong, he loves his nephew but having him for more than an hour would render him insane. Children— especially the ones with the same age as his nephew, Jisung— scare him. More so with the fact that he thinks children like Jisung hold so much power. 

“C’mon, Doyoung. It’s only for a week,” his older brother pleads. “We’ll cover all his expenses and we’ll send you food for a week.”

Doyoung scans Gongmyung up and down. The older one of the Kim brothers really have an apologetic look so Doyoung does nothing but sigh. “Send me food for two weeks.” 

Gongmyung lights up and envelopes him in a tight, ecstatic hug. “Love you, little bro! We owe you!” 

And just like that, he is left with a 3-year old kid and a ton of work to do. 

In Gongmyung’s list, it says that Jisung has a doctor’s appointment on Wednesday, his rest day. Conveniently, that is today so Doyoung drives to the address attached to Gongmyung’s list. He carefully poked Jisung awake. It took him at least two minutes to fully awaken the toddler and another minute to figure out how to take him out of the baby seat. 

God, he’s so not ready to be a dad. 

A nurse greets them and leads them to the waiting area. Doyoung removes Jisung’s parka and lets him play in the toy area of the clinic. 

“Kim Jisung, Doctor Lee is ready for you!” The nurse calls out. Doyoung opens his arms and calls Jisung. 

“Jisungie, come to uncle!” The toddler waddles to his arms and he lifts him up. They go into the room and he sits Jisung on the checkup table. The doctor, a handsome young man with pink hair, greets Doyoung with a curt nod. Doyoung forgets how to act and gives him an awkward wave. 

“You must be Jisung’s uncle! His dad notified me a day ago that you’re coming with Jisung to his monthly checkup!” He says, the last part sounding too lively to get Jisung’s spirits up. A smile blooms on all of their faces, much to Doyoung’s surprise. He’d usually listen to all the words a doctor says but he spaces out at how attractive this one is. 

The doctor runs some tests on Jisung who just giggled a lot and babbled about his favorite dinosaur. Doctor Lee just listened to him attentively, giving enthusiastic replies to Jisung, even to some of his incomprehensible chatter. 

“How are you with uncle, Jisungie?” Doctor Lee asks the toddler while he measures his weight. Doyoung’s ears perk up as he attempts to hide his expectant gaze. 

“Uncle is like a lion, when he’s angry he roars.” 

Doyoung coughs awkwardly as a blush creeps on his cheeks and ears. The doctor looks at him with a playful glint in his eyes. 

“Oh really? Are you not scared, Jisungie?” He asks the toddler whose height is now being measured. Jisung shakes his head.

“Uncle looks like a bunny,” he says distractedly. Doyoung’s blush worsens and he tries to lower his head to hide his embarrassment. 

Doctor Lee and Jisung continue to talk while Doyoung watches them do their thing. Good thing they stopped talking about him or else he’d have combusted in front of the cute doctor. 

“So, Jisung’s heart is actually okay right now, should it act up again with the new dose of medicine, run him to me instantly. He is a little underweight right now, so he just needs to gain a little more weight and that’s it. Otherwise, he’s in tip top shape!” He says with a smile only men in Doyoung’s dreams have. This feels too unreal. The doctor kneels down to Jisung and hands him a marshmallow. 

“Here is for being such a good sport, Jisung. Try to stay healthy, promise?” He says offering a fist out to the boy. Jisung fistpumps him and accepts the marshmallow.

“Promise,” Jisung replies with the toothiest grin Doyoung has ever seen from him. The sight in front of him made him almost melt into a puddle. Who’d known that in an instant, Doyoung’s taste in men could change that drastically. He always thought that he’s okay with men who are indifferent to children because he’s like that as well, but thank you Doctor Lee for showing him men who are good with handling children are a whole different species. 

The week with Jisung wasn’t as bad as he thought it’d be. He finished his work in between nap times and tv time although itsy bitsy spider is stuck in his head 24 hours of the day. He didn’t notice that Gongmyung and his wife are already picking Jisung up. He’s actually a little sad about that.

“Bye uncle! Jisungie will miss you!” Jisung exclaims. Doyoung giggles at him and kisses the crown of his head. 

“Uncle will miss you too, Jisungie.” 

After a handful of farewells between Jisung and him, he drops down to his couch with a tired sigh. He opens his phone to check his slowly mailbox. He hasn’t touched the app in a week and he forgot about the numerous letters he sent out which now all have responses. 

He reads all of them and smiles at how everything is so friendly and wholesome. He replies to Taeil Moon who shares a random story about being an Asian chef in Europe. He also writes to Jungwoo who is in his last year of college and gives him some encouragement. He responds to Huang Renjun of China’s failed attempts for pickup lines with corny pickup lines of his own. Lastly, he responds to Lee Jeno, another newbie in the pen pal industry who chose to waste his post stamps for Doyoung. 

Enjoying his time replying to the letters to him, he finds Lee Taeyong’s letter at the very bottom of his inbox. He opens the _‘write letter’_ page and starts to type. 

_Hello ^^ I know I went MIA the past week because I babysat my nephew and it took up most of my free time. I really don’t like children and he’s the only one I really tolerate. Wow, how cool is it that you’re a pediatrician!! We must be complete opposites :(( anyway, I hope you have a good day! Still very eager for your reply bc I kinda wanna be friends hehe._

_-doyoung @.@_

_PS: How do you deal with children? You meet a lot per day (I assume) and you still love them. LITERALLY HOW?? I get to take care of one child and suddenly I feel like 10 years has been taken away from my lifespan._

Two days later, a reply from Taeyong welcomed itself in his notifications. Eagerly opening his phone, he reads the letter.

_Hi :) It’s okay! I started to think you forgot about me or something hahaha. Children are actually angels if you treat them properly. Your nephew must be really cute. I mean all children are cute hehe especially the ones who are spoiled rotten to the core <3 (oh my god sense my sarcasm, okay?) You just need very, very long patience and understanding to deal with as many of them as I do. I’d say it’s a talent. Hbu, what’s your talent? _

_Love always,_ _  
__TY_

_PS: I’d like to be friends with you too._

Doyoung finds a silly, sheepish grin creep on his face. After his realization that men with children skills are on top of his list right now, Taeyong instantaneously becomes a lot more attractive.

Well, in the sense that he just sounds like a swell guy in his letters.

“Kim Doyoung, you don’t even know if the guy is gay,” he mumbles to himself. He doesn't know when the right time to come out to him will be, but right now, he’s just going to enjoy talking to his pen pals.

Especially Lee Taeyong. 

And just like that, Taeyong becomes the closest pen pal he has. They exchange letters so much the past few weeks that Doyoung forgets about things he shouldn’t have forgotten. 

Things like his meeting with other screenwriters and his boss.

He really liked his job. He loved creating stories and weaving them into something that the masses will love, he loved developing and researching for a pitch and the other parts that entail being a screenwriter. He knew what he got into the moment he applied to be one, but what he absolutely hated about it is his boss. It was not part of the job description to carry coffees around and run errands all day for Heechul, a man whose style looks like it came from 2013 tumblr. 

He knows it’s because he’s only been working in film for two years. To everyone, he’s still a newbie. Perhaps he does really identify as one, only because of the fact that he still doesn't know what genre he’d like to specialize in, but it doesn’t mean he can’t do his job properly. 

It was an errand day today. Heechul makes him do all the dirty work in the guise of “experiencing the real world to create more realistic stories.”

Doyoung isn’t dumb, he just needed someone to get his clothes from the dry cleaners and to buy dog food for his puppy. He knows he has no other choice but to begrudgingly do everything Heechul says when all his superiors are looking at him with anticipatory looks plastered on their faces. 

He huffs and leaves his chair in the meeting and leaves. To make matters worse, the traffic today in the main highways are so sickening. Doyoung’s 5-minute drive to Heechul’s dry cleaning shop took him at least 20 minutes. He can’t wait for this day to finish so he could lie in the comfort of his sheets thinking about how he’ll send Heechul to hell.

The day eventually ends, and he finds out that he has the task to fact check some of the things in their script when he wasn’t even at the meeting. He goes home and slams the door. The plants on the table beside his door shaking at how hard he shut his door. 

Throwing his clothes on the bin, he indulges himself in a hot shower. It takes him a long time to wash all the stress from his body and for him to actually feel better about today.

He runs to his bed and jumps on it, feeling it engulf the expanse of his whole being. 

“I hate today, fuck.”

Doyoung closed his eyes for a few minutes but ultimately failed at falling into deep slumber, his brain just had too much to say. He checks his phone and replies to some of his friends’ texts and then answers some replies on his social media accounts. 

He, once again, finds his finger hovering over Taeyong’s mail. They’ve mostly just introduced themselves through the course of their letters. He never once opened up about the inner workings of his life to a stranger. So, because of his reluctance, he asks Johnny if opening up to a stranger is worth it, and Johnny replies with a casual

_‘What do you have to lose?’_

So, he does it. He opens up to Lee Taeyong.

_Hello, I actually don’t know if we’re at the phase where I can openly rant about things, but my friend Johnny told me I have nothing to lose so please don’t mind me while I break down :( I love my job, really I do. Making stories come so easily to me, but I’m not taken seriously. Today, instead of attending a very important meeting, my boss asked me to run errands for him the whole day, then they gave me a job when I wasn’t even in the meeting. I know it’s because I’m the youngest in the team, but that doesn’t mean they should discredit me like that. I’m good at what I do, I know I am. It’s just that… I don’t know if I’m sick of it. Anyway, thank you for listening??_

_-Doyoung @.@_

_PS: If you feel uncomfortable with me talking about stuff like this, just tell me okay? I’ll stop._

Doyoung was in a cafe with Yuta, Hyuck, and Johnny when he received Taeyong’s mail. He’d been anticipating it the whole day, it made him look at his phone more than usual. A silly smile made its way to his face, just like any other time he receives a response from Taeyong. 

“What’s got you smiling like that?” Yuta asks him. Doyoung looks up to them, eyes shining with excitement. He shakes his head and opens his phone. 

“You look ridiculous, hyung. What happened to having a healthy relationship with your phone?” Hyuck chuckles, biting into his cupcake. He blushes, he can’t help not to be obvious when it comes to Taeyong. It’s kind of therapeutic, kind of like an emotional support boy. 

_Hello! I’m sorry you had to go through that :( Your boss is such a dick. I can relate though, my colleagues did not take me seriously too, because I finished med school early. But don’t let them discourage you, if anything, make them the reason you work harder. It’s better to have a healthy mindset that way. I hope you’re feeling better once this gets to you ^^._

_Love always,_ _  
__TY_

_PS:_

“PS, you can tell me anything you want, I’ll try my best to help. It doesn’t make me uncomfy because we’re friends now, smiley face,” Yuta says from behind him. Doyoung whips his head around to see Yuta reading the letter. He quickly shuts his phone off and smacks his japanese square on the head.

“Stop doing that,” He says to Yuta who is just sporting a giddy smile beside him. 

“You seem to be enjoying that pen pal app too much, Doie.”

Doyoung defensively turns his head away from his friends and frowns. He won’t attest to it completely, because Taeyong’s the only pen pal he’d actually drop everything for. So, he only enjoys it because of Taeyong. 

When everything— he means his friends’ incessant teasing— died down, he smirks at what his pen pal said to him. How is he so nice like that? 

* * *

A few months pass by, maybe 30 pen pals later, Doyoung and Taeyong still exchange letters. Doyoung tells him about his new-found affinity for gardening, the netflix shows he watches, his nephew, and all the other things that run in and out of his life while Taeyong radiates the same enthusiasm he had the first time they talked. He talks about the children in his work, how he volunteers at orphanages and how he adopted a dog and named it Ruby. Everything about Taeyong just enamoured him and every word that is encapsulated in his letters to Doyoung emanates sincerity, which fits Taeyong’s image in his mind perfectly. 

At first, Doyoung was content with only having Taeyong for a pen pal, but he eventually got greedy. There came a time when all he thought about was how Taeyong looks, or how he sounds like, or how tall he is compared to Doyoung. Then recently, he grew impatient waiting for Taeyong’s mail to arrive, even if it only took at least 24 hours. It just made him a little bit crazier.

So, he gathers up the courage to do a thing he should’ve asked before. 

_Hi :D! I had a great day btw, thanks for asking ^^ Also i racked my whole being to get this kind of courage. You can say no if you want to :(( but can we meet? I am dying to meet you!!_

_-Doyoung @.@_

_PS: if u decide to say yes, can we meet at Sun & Moon cafe? _

He hesitates to send it for a while, scared that Taeyong won’t reply back because he asked. _‘He might actually say yes, Doyoung.’_ he thinks so he just goes for it and waits.

The next night, he receives mail from the person he’s been waiting to answer. 

_I’d like to meet up, Doyoung! I’m actually free next Saturday, and I know Sun & Moon. I frequented that cafe when I was in med school. I’m very very very excited to see you! _

_Love always,_ _  
__TY_

_PS: Thank you for pulling the courage to ask me :D I wouldn’t be able to do it myself even if I’ve been thinking about it for a while now._

He double takes at the text and rubs his eyes trying to make sure he wasn’t just hallucinating. When his vision and brain are clear, he jumps out of bed and squeals. 

Yes, he squeals. Like a lovestruck teenage girl. He dances happily and grins at his plants absent-mindedly. 

“Lee Taeyong, what are you?” he whispers.

Doyoung goes on about his week just like normal, but when it neared Saturday, he couldn’t help the slight bounce to his steps, his random grins and the lighter tone in his voice. His friends quickly took notice of it as they shared confused glances at each other.

“What’s gotten into you, Youngdo?” Yuta asks him, while he smacks Hyuck for ruining his game in Kart Rider. 

Doyoung opens his mouth but is cut off by Johnny. “He’s meeting up with that TY guy he’s speaking to in that pen pal app.” 

Yuta and Hyuck hum in approval and continue with their game. Doyoung tries to hide his smile, but there it is again. Creeping up on his face like a fever. Trying to hide his excitement is close to impossible, it honestly is ridiculous.

“His name is Taeyong.”

Hyuck looks to him with a playful gleam in his eyes, “Ah, so he has a name.”

Doyoung just scoffs silently and continues to stare at his phone screen. They all fall into a comfortable silence with only game sounds resounding in the background. 

“Guys is this a crush?” He asks them. Doyoung takes one look at his friends and shakes his head. “Nevermind, don’t answer me. What do you know about this.”

Johnny rolls his eyes and sits beside Doyoung, offering a very friendly arm around his shoulder. “I do know a lot about this, my friend. And you’re not gonna like what I’m gonna tell you.” 

Doyoung just blinks at him while Johnny, with a very serious sigh tells him, “It’s a serious crush, Doie.” 

Hyuck and Yuta burst out in a chesty laughter at Doyoung’s dismayed face. The youngest one jokingly punches Yuta while he laughs persistently. 

“Hyung, did you see that? Doyoung hyung was really expecting something.” 

Doyoung walks over to them and slaps Donghyuck at the back of his head. “I didn’t raise you to be this annoying, Hyuck.” 

“I love you hyung, but you know I live to annoy you.” 

Friday night, a thunderstorm roars through the skies. Doyoung hopes and prays that tomorrow’s weather will be good. He just wants tomorrow to be a good day for the both of them because he anticipated this day the moment Taeyong said yes to meet up.

He wakes up though to the same sound of rain pit-pattering on his window sill and the sound of thunder outside his house. He checks the time on his phone only to see that it’s 9 am and looks out to the gray skies outside. Yuta texts him advising him to cancel his plans today.

**_Yuta: don’t go out today doie it’s dangerous and dont be sad about it too much okay?_ **

Doyoung sighs and rubs his face. Yuta does have a point and it’s best to follow it seeing that there is zero visibility in the roads. He frowns and sits down sadly on his bed, already opening Taeyong’s slowly account.

 _I don’t know when exactly this will reach you, but if you waited in S &M and I wasn’t there I am terribly sorry :((((( the storm wasn’t something I expected too. I looked forward to meeting you— I still am looking forward to meeting you… if you’re okay with it :(( I hope you stayed safe from the storm _

_-Doyoung @.@_

_PS: I’m really sorry, I hope you don’t think I stood you up._

The next day wasn’t really better because it’s still raining. Doyoung distracted himself from his sadness by tending to his plants and starting on the paint by numbers project he started almost a month ago. He just hopes Taeyong isn’t mad at him and that he stays safe from the rain. 

From his desk, he hears the subtle vibration of his phone. Finishing up with his painting, he sets it aside and then walks to his desk to check his phone. 

A letter from Taeyong meets his eye and he opens it cautiously trying to prepare himself for the worst.

_Oh my god, Doyoung. You don’t have to say sorry, I also did not leave the house. I got so sad because of the storm, but I hope you and the people you love are safe from it! I promise I’m safe too hehe. Ruby got scared of the thunder, so we just cuddled in my bed and watched some netflix. Don’t worry, Doyoung. We can meet some other time :D when the weather doesn’t hate the both of us so much._

_Love always,_ _  
__TY_

_PS: I think we should just move to text?? To make planning easier (I mean, if that’s okay with you)_

_If your answer is yes, you can reach me at xxxxxxxxxxxxx_

Doyoung stares at the number at the end of Taeyong’s letter. Part of him is relieved that Taeyong is okay and that he didn’t stand him up, but there’s a part of him that panics thinking about texting Taeyong. 

The latter part consumes more space on his mind right now. He calls Johnny— since he always refers to himself as a love therapist (he’s not) (but he’s the only option right now). 

Johnny picks up on the first ring and Doyoung just breathes on his phone.

“Doyoung? Stop breathing so loud. It’s creeping me out.”

He snaps out of it and just unleashes his gay panic to his friend. “Johnny, Taeyong asked me to text him. What do I do?”

“I thought you’re a smart guy, Doie.” he deadpans. Doyoung just gulps and paces around his living area.

“I’m gonna melt before I type out my first message, I might combust.”

On the other line, Johnny rolls his eyes at his friend. “You know, for someone so shameless when it comes to other things, you really suck at this.” 

“I know.” 

“Just text him and say hi. You said before that conversation is never awkward between you guys, right? Then have faith in that dynamic of yours.” Johnny says, tone very sage. Doyoung nods his head— lips tight— kind of more in assuring himself than Johnny. 

“Okay, I’ll do just that. Thanks, Johnny.” 

“Good luck with that, buddy,” He says and hangs up, leaving Doyoung to his own devices. Doyoung huffs and lounges on his couch and stares at Taeyong’s number for seconds. 

“Should I go for it? Should I not go for it?” He asks no one in particular. “I don’t know.”

It’s just a text, why is he so scared?

“It’s Taeyong. It’s gonna be fine.” One last reassurance from himself and he copies Taeyong’s number to his messages. 

_‘Hi! It’s me! Doyoung!’_

Too enthusiastic. He erases it. 

_‘Hey, Doyoung here.”_

Too indifferent. He erases it once again.

_‘Whats up :D It's Doyoung? From slowly’_

Sounds dumb. He erases it. Who’d known saying hi is so hard. 

_‘Hi :) it’s Doyoung’_

Finally, he presses send, satisfied with how the text sounded. He lets out a breath that he didn’t know he was holding. 

Waiting for a text reply from Taeyong is a whole different category of pain than from waiting for a reply from him on slowly. It’s not like it’s different... except when Taeyong sends him a response back, it’s going to arrive in real time. The very thought of him and Taeyong texting stresses him out and just like any other time Doyoung feels stressed, he tends to his plants again even if it didn’t need any tending. 

Just because he’s anticipating Taeyong’s answer. Also, just because his crush on someone who he hasn’t met before is bordering on comical and absurd.

Just when Doyoung finished rearranging his pots of plants, his phone vibrated. He sprints to where it’s situated and looks at the text that’s on his lockscreen.

_‘Hey! We’re finally texting :)’_

Doyoung smiles mindlessly, suddenly forgetting about his own worries, and saves Taeyong’s contact as **TY :D**

It’s been a week since Doyoung texted Taeyong. He notices how Taeyong’s texting style is different from his letter-writing style. He’s more easy-going on text and his sense of humor peaks through. They seem to flirt a lot now. Jokingly, of course much to Doyoung’s chagrin. But nonetheless, it makes him giddy. Like a whole zoo erupts in his stomach everytime. Johnny is right, he’s got nothing to worry about when it involves Taeyong. He’s basically a perfect person already.

Except that he doesn’t want to show his face to Doyoung. Yuta warns him that Taeyong might just be an online predator because it’s really sketchy.

“I don’t know, Doyoung. Something seems wrong with not showing your face. Especially when you two basically know everything about each other.”

Doyoung makes a prickly face at Yuta and defends, “He said he doesn’t wanna lose the opportunity of seeing my face first in real life.”

Yuta nods, with an all-knowing gaze on his face. “Exactly what a predator would say. He might be a 60-year old man for all you know.” 

“No, Taeyong’s just like that. Also, he’s your age.”

“People deceive innocent people like you easily on the internet, Doie,” Yuta states. “Just be careful when you meet him.”

Doyoung shrugs him off, “I will.”

Even though Doyoung is disappointed about not getting a Taeyong selfie when the chance is already there in front of him and even if Yuta planted the possibility of Taeyong being a 60-year old man in his brain, he’s still looking forward to meeting his pen pal. Maybe just for his own peace of mind, or maybe just to prove Yuta wrong. 

Maybe, both. But for whatever reason it is, he still really wants to meet Taeyong.

They planned to meet at Sun & Moon again, the same time as the last plan. Again, Doyoung’s hopes are up and his expectations are high. He really isn’t the type to be late for anything but this time, every unlucky thing that could happen to him is currently manifesting itself. 

On the day where he hopes everything runs smoothly. 

“The universe hates me, it’s confirmed.” 

The elevator in his complex stopped working, trapping him and three other people inside for 5 minutes. His pants ripped too, when his car keys fell to the ground and he went to pick it up. So, he ran back to his apartment to change. To make matters worse, some roads are being fixed because of the storms making the traffic unbearable. 

Arriving at Sun & Moon, he expects Taeyong to be there already. Unsure of what Taeyong looks like, he recalls how he said he’d be wearing a cow-print jacket. Looking around the whole cafe, he sees no one wearing the flashy jacket. Actually no one is wearing anything cow-printed. 

Disappointed, he sits at a corner booth and waits. He starts listing out reasons why Taeyong could be late.

  1. _He could be stuck in traffic_
  2. _He woke up late_
  3. _He forgot about their meeting_
  4. _He stood him up_
  5. _He’s really a predator who’s just playing with him_



Doyoung didn’t want to believe that it’s the latter. Taeyong is too nice to trick him like that, and also, he can just text him. 

Right?

“Where the fuck is my phone?” He mumbles to himself, trying to find it in his pocket. He goes out to his car and checks if he dropped it accidentally but to no avail, his phone isn’t there.

“Fuck,” he seethes. 

He waits again while facing the door, trying to see if a man in a cow-print jacket is going to come in but unfortunately, he gets nothing but boisterous college students and couples in matching outfits. Doyoung looks around to see some sympathetic looks on him and it dampers his spirit. 

Officially defeated, he drives back home without ever meeting Taeyong. His phone sits silently on his kitchen island, mocking him for his stupidity today. 

A bunch of texts with a bunch of sad emojis and sorrys from Taeyong filled his lockscreen.

**_TY :D:_ ** _doyoung!!! I have to raincheck today :((((_

 **_TY :D:_ ** _I was needed urgently at the clinic today_

 **_TY :D:_ ** _I hope you’re not mad :(( I’m so sorry_

Doyoung softens at the texts, his anger flushed from his entire body. He’s still upset about the whole ordeal, but he guesses it’s no one’s fault since the odds are never in favor of Doyoung and Taeyong. It’s as if the forces of the universe are repelling the two of them apart. He just replies to him reassuring him it’s okay.

It’s always okay if it’s Lee Taeyong.

Doyoung’s grocery trips are something he really dreads. He’d rather order out but his friends (even Hyuck who is 4 years younger than him) insist that he cook his own food. It’s not like he’s unable to cook, in fact, he cooks better than his older brother. It’s just he doesn’t even eat that much, especially when he concentrates on a project. It’s no big deal. But this time he’s doing groceries because Gongmyung and his family are visiting him. 

It’s always a constant battle with himself everytime he goes out to do groceries, seeing how indecisive he is when choosing items— well in choosing and deciding anything in general. Doing groceries are also always a tedious process, except for the time when Doyoung fought an old lady for stealing the last pint of strawberry ice cream.

This time, he probably thinks it’s the same uninteresting day as the rest of his grocery days. But then suddenly a very familiar face greets him in the children’s food aisle. 

“Jisung’s uncle! Hi!” The man greets him, a warm smile plastered on his face _._ Doyoung returns his smile and wave. 

“Doctor Lee! Nice to see you.”

The doctor laughs and it rings in Doyoung’s mind a little longer than it should. “I need to ask you something, is that okay?”

He nods his head. 

“What snack do you think kids like these days?” He asks, eyes filled with genuine curiosity.

Doyoung scans the shelves for something that Jisung would pick out. He sees the bright pink packaging of the jelly that Jisung eats and picks it out.

“Jisung obsesses over this jelly. Watermelon, peach, and strawberry are the best flavors.” 

Doctor Lee takes a handful of jelly packs and gives Doyoung a thankful smile and says, “Thanks, Jisung doesn’t stop talking about you, by the way,” and leaves. 

“Damn, he’s so hot,” Doyoung whispers to himself while getting the same jelly packs as the doctor. 

After a very fun lunch with his brother, he opens his phone to text Taeyong. They’ve been planning to meet up for quite a while now, but the circumstances aren’t always in their favor. Schedules clash, weather shitty, emergencies. The world never worked in favor of Doyoung when it comes to Taeyong.

It’s disheartening for them both, but Doyoung never backs out, so he just tries to fight for the both of them. Because Taeyong is special to him and because he knows that when they meet, the balance of Doyoung’s world will once be restored. 

Thinking that he needs a breather, he wears his trainers and goes to the park near his apartment complex. It took him a few weeks to conclude that he really likes Taeyong— as in with full-fledged gut-wrenching feelings that burn your insides— kind of like. The other never lacked in assuring him that he isn’t an online catfisher or predator or that he’s a 60-year old man. He said he just wants the first time they meet to be special. 

Doyoung respects it, but it’s not for him. Seoul isn’t that big, so what are the chances that they’ve already met? He thinks it over again, and again, and again until his mind goes overdrive. So, he walks. 

He walks until his feet tire out. He walks around until his thoughts die down and he only stops when he sees a figure waving to him from far away.

Doyoung didn’t have the best eyesight, so he squinted to focus on the person waving. The person— together with his dog— walks closer to him. Doyoung stands still, confused because he still couldn’t see properly. 

“Jisung’s uncle!” A familiar voice calls out. Doyoung affixes a small smile on his face to greet the doctor.

“Doctor Lee, we seem to keep bumping into each other!” He says with an amused chuckle. 

“We do,” the doctor laughs. And again, it rings a little too long in Doyoung’s mind. 

“Your dog is so cute,” Doyoung coos, kneeling down to pet the papillon. The dog happily wags its tail and licks his hand. 

“Yeah, her name is Ruby.” 

Doyoung stops and looks at him, “funny, I have a friend whose dog is named Ruby too.” 

The doctor giggles and pets his dog too. “There must be a lot of dogs named Ruby, don’t you think Jisung’s uncle?”

“You can just call me Doyoung.” 

The other man seems to mull something over when Doyoung introduces himself. He has a contemplative look on his face, and his eyebrows are knit together.

“Is something the matter, doctor?” Doyoung asks, suddenly conscious of everything around him. 

“Y-you can call me Taeyong,” he says carefully. “I’m Lee Taeyong.” 

Doyoung blinks at him, trying to wrap his head around the fact that Lee Taeyong— the guy who made him feel silly feelings, the one who says ‘love always’ at the end of his letters, the guy who invaded his life with caring and kind words— is standing before him. Also, the fact that they’ve met before is so hard to comprehend because he was just too in his head about it.

Feels unreal.

“Oh,” was all he said. “Oh!” 

Taeyong laughs at him and offers a hand. Doyoung bites his lip and looks at it. 

“Nice to meet you, Kim Doyoung.” 

Doyoung pulls Taeyong into a friendly hug. “Nice to finally meet you, Lee Taeyong.”

The whole situation really felt fake. At first when they started to have a full conversation, Doyoung started to doubt if Taeyong is real. He’d fantasize the day they’d meet, he never imagined that it’d be in a children’s clinic while his nephew gets his monthly checkup. He also did not expect that the doctor he had the hots for would turn out to be the crush he found on a pen pal app. 

Maybe everything was already in his favor, he was just really dumb to realize. 

Anyway, they both go home with giant grins on their faces. Doyoung’s first instinct is to call his friends to tell them about how his miserable life just turned itself upside down. He can’t really contain his excitement about meeting Taeyong. 

The first person he calls is Yuta and it’s only to prove a point. 

“Yes? I was in the middle of a match,” Yuta says exasperatedly.

“Yu, guess what?” Doyoung enthused. 

“What, Youngdo?”

“I met Taeyong and he’s not a 60-year old man. That’s all bye!” 

Yuta sputters out a few words, but he just hangs up on him. He also tells Johnny and Hyuck with the same energy he had when he called Yuta except both of them genuinely sounded happy for him.

“That’s great, hyung! Now you don’t have to sulk anymore,” Hyuck quips. 

“That’s amazing! If you have any love problems, you can just go to me!” Johnny offers with a frivolous laugh.

Before sleeping, Doyoung receives a text message with a cute selfie from Taeyong. 

**_TY :D: Good night <3_ ** **_  
_** **_(image)_ **

**_Doyoung: good night, Taeyong! :*_ ** **_  
_** **_(image)_ **

Finally, a Taeyong selfie.

Two days later, a letter from Taeyong arrives in Doyoung’s slowly mailbox. 

_Doyoungie~~ I’m actually grateful that we met like that because everytime we plan something, it always backfires. I started to think that we weren’t meant to be :(( But anyway, I told you our first meeting would be special :D we didn’t even know it. Now that you know that I’m not a predator or an old man, do you wanna go on a date with me?_

_Love always,_ _  
__TY_

_PS: I only accept yes as an answer._

* * *

Finding love was never Taeyong’s objective in using the pen pal app. It was only supposed to be harmless and friendly fun, but love has ways of inching itself into each and every person’s lives. 

In his case, love came in the form of Kim Doyoung.

Nothing like it happened to him in the past. Before Doyoung, Taeyong only talked to Winwin and Chenle from China and he’d only have them on the borders of being distant friends and then Doyoung happened— fortunately. He never knew when it happened exactly. They have exchanged so many words to each other that he did not notice how this boy is already worming himself into Taeyong’s thoughts. It was frustrating at first. Something akin to a film called A Series of Unfortunate Events. 

The doors were open for them all that time, they were just tip-toeing around them mostly. Good thing fate became kind to them at the end because they’ve been together for 6 months now and still going strong.

He writes it down, the memories, the coincidences, and the feelings. He puts it down in letter, just like the old days.

_Doie, I’m writing this a day before the first anniversary of your first letter to me, so you should receive this on the exact date we started talking. I hold you very dear in my heart, you know that already. I can’t promise you anything big, but I promise to work hard to keep our ship from sinking. There is not a day that passes by where I don’t thank fate for bringing you to me. The threads of our lives have been woven into beautiful tapestry. It was nice. More serendipitous than we think. Tomorrow it’d be our first year knowing each other and our 6 months dating. I’m more thankful for you more than you are for me. You are the best, Kim Doyoung._

_Love always,_ _  
__Lee Taeyong_

_PS: I Love You (so much)._

**Author's Note:**

> You can reach and dm me on my [twitter](https://twitter.com/doyoungagenda)! Let's be friends :D


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